Thoughtful (& some controversial) Relationship Questions to Know Your Partner Better
Let’s take a break. I want a breakup. Let’s get a divorce. Is this what’s happening in your mind, or do you feel these thoughts might arise? It would help if you went through this. The relationship is as complicated as you make it. Once you put your cards on the table, you know about yourself, your partner, and vice versa, and there will be no difficulties later on. I know love is important, but understanding, communication, space, and respect help mold a relationship into a near-perfect one.
The urge to talk, and question, is not always wrong! You need to know about your partners’ psyche, their emotional state, what they have experienced in the past, what they are going through now, and their aspirations and hopes for the future. The only way to sustain any relationship is through communication, whatever medium that might take.
There’s no perfect time to question but make this more fun, like an exercise or a quiz. Ask 5 new questions every day, and discuss them. That’ll help reveal your personality too. You are not interviewing him/her, so don’t go too hard. Remember to respect and understand each other’s replies. No matter how grown up you are, don’t let the little child in you die, have fun with these questions; they’ll only strengthen your bond. A few related questions will help you frame your words and lead to a meaningful discussion. Warning: these might lead to the emergence of some pretty surprising insights. Play safe and love each other, always! Enjoy…
Deep Relationship Questions
The more you communicate and express, the more you reveal the deeper mystery that you are. Therefore, the correct set of questions for the conversation is significant here! Beware, though; the answers might cause quite a stir. All you need to do- is be sincere and honest- don’t let your inhibitions falter you. Here is the “deeper conversation” setting questions:
What do you think/feel about each other’s family?
For any person, family is sublime. What you feel about them reveals how you’d want “your” family to be like.
Would you sacrifice for the stability of your relationship?
Sacrifices and compromises are part and parcel of any relationship. Remember that it should never get the best of your self-respect. How far would you go?
What is the ultimate end of this relationship?
Probably keep this question for the end! Are we going somewhere? Are we just here to have fun? Is there a prospect of marriage somewhere down the line? This is what clears it up!
Have you ever cheated in any of your past relationships?
Talking about the past is often a bummer, but that unveils the deeper person you are. What is the concept of “cheating” after all for your partner?
How much has our relationship changed, since the beginning?
This is where you both introspect and hope to get the best out of the changes.
Do I help make you a better person?
A relationship is not only about the love-ish feeling all the time, but a thing to note is also how much you grow in it psychologically.
What are you most passionate about?
Be it career-wise or hobby-wise, make sure you enjoy it with your partner.
Looks or intelligence?
It’s a personality question.
What are your opinions on politics about the political scenario of your country right now?
This isn’t just a topic! You need to share your opinions and have a healthy discussion.
Discuss climate change and feminism.
You must have a healthy discussion about worldwide issues. Convey your ideas. It’ll only help you develop.
What is the one thing that you hate about me?
No one is perfect. Know your flaws and work on them.
What’s your biggest fear, in our relationship?
This always has an answer, try to go deeper into your own mind. Express what you feel. Don’t be afraid to let it out.
Am I too possessive or clingy? And do you want me to change it?
Don’t change. Being protective is good. Just don’t be too loud on that.
What’s the perfect time for marriage?
And I’m not talking about natural seasons. I’m talking about the “age” seasons.
What’s the correct time for having babies? And how many should we have?
If you are that committed, try discussing this as early as possible.
Relationship Questions To Ask any Guy/Boyfriend
Introvert or extrovert, whatever he is, any man would love being questioned. Moreover, you need to know their mindset too. That’s how you grow after all, right? Here are a few of them:
Do I look good with or without make-up? And why?
There are days when we ladies like to pop up a little shimmer and get the right shade, it makes us feel good… But what does your man think about this look?
What’s my favorite flavor in cakes? Does he even pay attention to what you eat?
That speaks a lot about him, I assure you!
Which of my girlfriends’ do you find most appealing?
Quickie here! Guys, don’t answer this. Now I know this can be controversial, but sometimes it’s good to answer with all honesty so that it reveals what he actually wants! Act accordingly I’d suggest.
What’s your favorite color?
Guys like all colors (This is a myth!). They do have a favorite. Make them happy, dress in it once in a while.
What has been the best moment in our relationship so far?
It’s good to know that he remembers your time together.
Do you like my friends, as in the ones I’m always around, be it guys or girls?
There are those days when your man is not just being possessive, but protective of you not getting the bad influence. The least you can do is value his words.
I don’t care if you have 6 packs, but do you think you are fit enough?
How do you take care of your fitness? Staying fit is very important for your health you all!
What is the most “guy” thing that you have ever done?
Now how you’ll define “guy thing” is totally on you.
Do you know how to drive?
We can take a cab home as well. But can you drive me crazy in love honey? Haha corny, no?
What’s your favorite feature in me?
Be it physical or behavior wise.
What will you do the next time I see you?
It’s good to know that your man imagines about you, as you do about him.
Does any song remind me of you? If yes, which one is it?
Music is a very significant part of anyone’s life. Relating the two could have beautiful conclusions.
When did you realize that you were falling in love with me?
Or it happened gradually over time?
Do you remember our first kiss?
Firsts are always special! If he remembers, you are a lucky person for sure.
How would you react to my periods?
Are you dating the guy, who deems menstrual cycle as nasty? Well, it’s high time you all need to consider this as a bodily phenomenon.
Relationship Questions To Ask a Girl/Girlfriend
Quit making her feel like she’s in a police station and is being interrogated. But, you need to know your girl, to make the “ship” in the relationship reach its dock! Here are a few questions that can help you:
How would you describe your exes?
It’s important to know the past before you move one. It’ll open you up to her likes and dislikes as well.
Name some nicknames that you call your friends, and ask her to name their real names. She has been with you for quite some time now and has ought to know about your personal life and about your friends too.
Would you be with me if I couldn’t spoil and pamper you with all those shiny things?
Are you dating a gold-digger? If she needs even a minute to think about this, know that you are in some trouble here.
Which celebrity relationship would you compare ours too?
Have some fun, don’t be too serious always!
How was your day?
Basic as it may sound. This simple question will surely bring a sunshine smile to her face.
How long do you see our relationship lasting?
No one has a vision of the future, but it is good to know that you do see one with your partner.
Do you fancy sunset or sunrise? And why?
Beautiful as they both are, this is more like a conversation setter.
Do you think we are ready, to get intimate with each other?
Consent matters, men! And when you ask them before you do it, they really do appreciate it.
Who has influenced you the most, ever since your childhood?
Getting back to the old days can bring back a tear or two.
Do you love the same sport that I do? And if not, would you mind taking interest in it?
It’s good to want to try and put your girl on the same sporty sense as you have. Even if she isn’t willing to, you could try.
What are your future plans?
Does she wanna work? Or what? What does your girl wanna do?
Are you comfortable around my guy friends?
Knowing how she feels about the people you hang out with is important. If she isn’t willing to stay around them, don’t force her; ask her the reason behind it.
I know you are an independent and confident woman, but are you willing to take note of any of the personality changes that I want in you?
Look, it’s okay if you don’t wanna change, but the least you could do is hear him out! And then make a decision.
Am I one of your top priorities?
You need to know whether she values you as much as you do.
What’s the wildest thing you wanna do?
Whether its some intimate fetish, or just go sky diving or bungee jumping.
Fun Relationship Questions
Imposing too many questions on your partner can often make it seem like a drag! Seriousness and awareness are as important as fun and entertainment. So here are a few Fun questions to lighten your mood and brighten your day (or night. Haha.). The following will have either you or your partner as the answer, so choose wisely!
Who spends the most time on social media?
No, nuh uh! Don’t deny that this thought never crossed your mind while she has her eyes scrolling through when you ask for some food, or he has his eyes up and down the football score while you ask for your car keys.
Who is the biggest baby when they’re sick?
Get it out. I know you want to! Of course, you can’t ask him/her to stop getting on your nerves. They’re SICK! Now you can…
Who farts more?
Told you this would be fun. You have been around for a long time, no matter how hard you try to hide, this will “pop” out.
Who is more responsible?
I surrender, I ain’t! Are you?
Who is the biggest flirt between you two?
Haven’t you seen his eyes brighten up, among those girlfriends of yours? Or, her drool over that amazing sense of humor that John has?
Who’s the better kisser?
Play safe, say that it’s her.
Who is more talkative?
Don’t worry, being talkative is a good thing. So long, you are that chatty with your partner.
Who spends more money?
Splurge alert! Don’t be a miser.
Who’s always the first to apologize?
Just remember! You don’t have to if you aren’t wrong. But sometimes, you’ve got to, that smile is definitely worth it right?
Who shows more affection?
And it doesn’t have to be the maternal instinct always!
Who’s better at keeping secrets?
Or do you blurt it all, in front of your friends?
Who’s more romantic?
Money doesn’t count. It has to come from the heart!
Name all the siblings of your S.O.
If you are committing finally, family is important too right!
Who is more stubborn?
No Karen! I am going to leave the wet towel on the bed. You got a partner like this too?
Who was the first to have a crush on the other?
Who was the first to think about the extended family dream. Haha!
Relationship Questions For Compatibility Test
Compatibility is another basic level that makes a relationship strong! Early conflicts generally fail this test, making the “last long” concept go into the trash. Here are some questions for both of you to answer to give a quick run up to your compatibility:
Which side of the bed would you sleep on?
Some people have choices some don’t. You should know that regardless.
If you could describe me in three words, what would they be?
Know what you both think about each other off the top! A quick tip: be honest!
If in crisis, other than you, whom does your S.O. call or text first?
Now you know who you are competing with, haha!
How can you tell if s/he is mad at you?
Happens more often than you think.
Spent Saturday night partying, or, whole day Sunday with?
It reveals a lot about your perceptions in this relationship.
What’s my dream destination?
Let’s see how both your minds work on this one.
What’s my zodiac sign?
I don’t believe in astrology, but many might.
Who is my celebrity crush?
I wish you dressed more like her, or, I wish you looked like him, like who?
What’s my favorite drink?
Lots of mornings, and lots of nights we have spent on this one. It’s got to be something other than water!
What am I allergic to?
Must have watched a lot of reactions eh?
Would you leave your work, to rush in to take care of your pregnant lady?
Actions speak louder than words, I know. But asking won’t harm.
What are your views on adoption?
We must all adopt! It not only controls the population but gives those innocent orphans a place to call their own.
At night, would the lights remain on or off?
Sleep is very important for your health. Get at least 6 hours of sleep.
What’s my favorite food/cuisine?
All those cafes and fine dining, and streetside tasting will now come to the test.
Controversial Relationship Questions
These are likely to cause controversy, as the title suggests, but it helps maintain transparency. At least you know what he/she wants. Here’s the startup:
What comes first- friends or our relationship?
This is an alternative to the chicken or egg question, based on our topic here.
Would you change me or take me as I am?
Change for the better? Or am I already the best?
Do I know how to handle my finances?
Financial questions reveal your materialistic expressions.
Could you still be friends with your exes?
Skies might turn grey with this one! So be gentle here.
Does my dressing style bother you?
Woman or man, whichever person you are, there are times when your S.O. would not conform to your dressing style. That’s where your understanding comes to play.
What’s your take on science and the supernatural?
This opens both your minds to how you perceive the world, be it similarly or differently.
Would you change your religion/caste/religious status for me?
Women are generally thought to adhere to the man’s religion post-marriage. This’ll be interesting to know.
Who has a better family? And why?
Now, this is something to discuss. Reason out your differences. Do you like the other family? Or not?
Do you believe in god? And why?
Now you or your partner might be atheists or theists. But why do you believe in a certain thing? There is a reason behind everything, right? Seek!
If you had to choose, would you choose me, or our baby?
This is a really stupid question. I know! But hey, fun is all about stupidity. Don’t get too worked up okay. The answer is always the two of you.
Would you ever mind a threesome? Do you take pleasure in it?
Could you see someone kiss your partner in front of you?
How would you define intimacy?
The meaning varies, whether it’s emotional or physical.
Do my questions bother you?
This might be fun! Are you tired of it, or do you feel it enhances your bond even more?
What if I ever watched a tv or web series without you?
These are one of those things that couples like doing together. I’m sure this will have an explosive reaction.
How would you react if I have a drunken night?
Just don’t drink and drive kids! And buy your own drinks!
Best Relationship Questions
These are some of the best ones in sight, that help mold your relationship with the perfect sugar or spice required. It’s a mix of simplicity and complexity, which makes it the perfect city for you two to be in. The following are the questions:
Would we still be the same 10 years from today?
Honesty is very important as I’ve mentioned it time and again. You need to know how both of your minds work, how compatible you both feel.
Would the perception of the “society” change your feelings for me?
It’s true, that we all have our own quirks that might not be very conventional. But what your partner feels about your quirks, is very important. Will she be with you till the end? Will he fight society for you?
What are your opinions on feminism?
Women empowerment and right to feminism is not just an interpersonal, but a global issue. Practicality is another aspect of the relationship!
What do you feel about our future?
Would you two end up getting married and start a family of your own, or would this relationship end shortly? How do you see yourselves?
What was your first impression of me?
The first impression is often the last impression. So you need to know how your S.O. felt and still feels about you.
What’s your opinion about live-in relationships?
Now I do know its a very common thing, but you never know…mentalities might vary!
Do you ever think about leaving me?
You need to know your faults as well. Where you’re going wrong might eventually lead you to the right path!
Does my smoking or drinking bother you?
If you have chosen your partner, you need to make every single effort that you can, to make them better. If it is harmful. Go ahead. Say it! If it’s fine occasionally, say that too. Don’t leave them miserable.
Are we going to stay at your place or mine, after we get married?
Now we’re the new generation. We don’t want to leave our parents alone! Not just the guy, but the girl too. This is a major issue that you need to sort out, before going ahead. Parents are the reason you are here, you need to take care of these gems.
If we ever get a divorce, who’ll keep the child?
See honestly, this question doesn’t deserve an answer. It’s a trick question! If your partner has to think about this, there’s a red flag ahead.
Just imagine, if you both come from a fair background, financially, would it bother you if I started everything from scratch again?
And this question goes both ways. The bond you share, is it materialistic or emotional?
Would you support me?
Support them if they are right, else, it’s your responsibility to help them do the right thing.
What are the three top values, that you wouldn’t change for the world?
A person must be rooted, for the least. Values and principles don’t change according to seasons or people.
How should we divide up our jobs/chores at home?
We live in a feminist society, and we’re proud of it! The relationship is, after all, a partnership, right?
Discuss your food habits. This is not a question, it’s an exercise that you might like to perform.
Any relationship is a bond, a partnership, a business where the outcome is love, your ventures will always be to build upon it. If you don’t agree with your S.O., it’s absolutely alright. You don’t need to accept or conform to every change, but you must understand what’s going around you, and what your partner wants.
Just remind yourself, that you always need to work on your relationship, no matter the tough times. However, the second you feel you need to compromise your self-respect, end it. Don’t let ego get the best of you, this is what plagues all you venture upon. Lastly, take into account what society says, but do what’s best for both of you. The love you share, will triumph over every evil, trust and support each other, and overcome the hard times with a smile.